More degrees, more jobs

President Obama’s job-creation plan, as reported by The Onion, includes:

* Everyone permitted one fake college degree per resumé

* Government program to train unemployed factory workers to weld 500 joints a minute so they stay competitive with robots

* Offer generous early retirement packages to workers who are extremely good at their jobs, thereby creating four to five new positions for incompetent morons

* Upping education spending to help ensure that Americans’ English communication skills are on par with India’s and China’s by 2018

The Onion is a satirical publication.


POSTED BY Joanne Jacobs ON February 8, 2011

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More degrees, more jobs — Joanne Jacobs

[...] President Obama’s job-creation plan, as reported by The Onion, includes: Everyone permitted one fake college degree per resumé. [...]

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